Imposter
2022-05-17 22:03:00
I have always felt like an imposter, and currently, I feel like one terribly.
I'm in the middle of doing my Accounting homework, and well, I just have to purge some thoughts. I feel like a fraud, that I am not learning anything, but I know that is not the truth. Yes, I do a lot of googling and reading, but that's the point of education, right? It's also how one can learn. But I am quite anxious about it. Maybe, I should not be too hard on myself? It's hard, though. I always wonder how will I deal with real life accounting. I'm really anxious about it. I heard it from my friend, who heard it from ̶a̶n̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶'̶v̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶e̶n̶ ̶m̶e̶s̶s̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶r̶o̶u̶n̶d ̶ her uncles that the training accountants get through college is really hard, but the job is easy. God, I hope that would be true. I am about to find out soon, and I really hope that it would be that way. That, or if it's really hard, I hope to have great mentors and coworkers.
Anyways, these stats below are stats from my website. These are the number of hits and views, I assume unique visitors, and that's quite a lot. My kouhai helped me put it into perspective. 300 people is a lot of people. I would have an anxiety attack in real life if 300 people put their attention towards me. This way of sharing my art through my website and social media feels safer. No one has to look at my appearance. They can just focus on my art and what I do. It's awesome.
Basically, my website averages 615 unique visitors. It gains a lot more when I update the site. I'm quite happy. Ah, I still need to fix the site keywords, so it appears on search engines.
Other than that, I feel quite goofy and energetic earlier. I am not quite sure where that energy has went and gone.
